I was so happy and was having a blast ripping it to pieces, but then….the momma actually took it away from me! It was made from a soft type of rubber and she was afraid the small pieces would lodge into my intestines. She said that the vets who work on the holidays are the ones who drew the short straw and are usually overworked. But I’m still sad that I could only play with my present for less than 10 minutes. Oh well, I guess that it’s better to not have emergency surgery on Christmas.

A few weeks ago, when she was visiting Sam to work on their project, a glass of red wine spilled all over his keyboard. She quickly disconnected the keyboard and started running it under clean tap water. Well, there are no words to describe the expression on Sam’s face when he saw her do this! She told him not to worry and that she knew what she was doing. Reluctantly, he let her continue and hooked up his laptop to his computer to continue working on the project. When the momma was satisfied that all of the red wine, dog hair, etc, were rinsed out, she took the keyboard downstairs to Sam’s kitchen. His oven has digital controls, so she turned the oven on to its lowest setting (170 F) and placed the keyboard upside down in the oven. After about 30 minutes or so, she returned to the kitchen to fetch the keyboard. As she reached in the oven, she burned both forearms on the top oven rack. She pulled out the keyboard and ………..   

good as new???? Fortunately….eventually…..Sam found it amusing that she had turned his spacebar into a banana!

Listened to: Burn from the album “The Crow: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack” by The Cure

Here’s a little puppy I can pick on……

Whoa! She’s bigger than I thought!

Submit and respect my authority!

Oh…you’re gonna get it now!

Hey! Two against one! No fair!

As a child, the momma learned about the law by watching episodes of Dragnet. She learned about politics by watching Laugh-In. She learned about medicine by watching Marcus Welby, MD. She learned about ignorance from All in the Family. She learned about prehistoric times from the Flintstones and Land of the Lost. She learned about the future from the Jetsons.

The momma is trying to tie up some loose ends before she leaves for her meeting next week, so, like Joe Friday, we’re going to end this abruptly.

When the momma and her friend were out enjoying the day on Monday, they stopped so her friend could photograph a beautiful tree with bright yellow leaves (one of these photos may pop up in a future entry). According to the momma’s friend, it was the perfect time of day for shooting photos…right before sunset. Anyway, this freakola comes running out of the house on the property near the tree and yells at the momma’s friend to stop taking pictures of his house. The momma’s friend explains that he was not taking photos of the house, but of the tree near the road. The freakola starts yelling that it’s his property and to stop taking pictures of it. This went on for several minutes. Of course, the momma’s friend had every right to photograph the tree near the road, but the momma was starting to get nervous so they left. 

• Aloe vera 
  • 
  • vomiting, diarrhea, depression, tremors
• Amaryllis 
  • 
  • (from erikogan’s photostream)
  • vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal pain, hypersalivation, depression, tremors
• Asparagus Fern 
  • 
  • (from The Equinest’s photostream)
  • contact allergic dermatitis. ingestion of berries: vomiting, abdominal pain, diarrhea
• Autumn Crocus 
  • 
  • oral irritation, vomiting blood, diarrhea, shock, multi-organ damage, bone marrow suppression
• Azalea 
  • 
  • vomiting, diarrhea, hypersalivation, hypotension, weakness, coma, cardiovascular collapse, death
• Baby’s Breath 
  • 
  • (from DeaPeaJay’s photostream)
  • vomiting
• Bird of Paradise 
  • 
  • (from DRB62’s photostream)
  • diarrhea, vomiting, incoordination
• Branching Ivy (Hedera helix) 
  • 
• • vomiting, abdominal pain, hypersalivation, diarrhea
• Brunfelsia 
  • 
  • vomiting, diarrhea, hypersalivation, tremors, seizures, muscle rigidity
• Buckeye 
  • 
  • vomiting, diarrhea, depression, hyperexcitability, dilated pupils, coma
  • Listened to: Build me up, Buttercup from the album “The Very Best Of The Foundations” by The Foundations

    ---

Just look at that cool way he wears his “slobbage”! When the momma and her friend are at work, us two dog dudes will be hanging out all week together. I’m way psyched about that!

“Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise” -Ben Franklin

“Put no trust in the benefits to accrue from early rising, as set forth by the infatuated Franklin …” -Mark Twain

The momma is most definitely NOT an early riser. Me, I like to get up around 4:30 or 5:00 am, take care of my bodily functions, eat, then go back to sleep for a few hours. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

In an attempt to encourage the momma to be an early riser, I found these tips at zenhabits.net.

The author actually switched from being a night owl to an early riser (and yes, it is possible). It has helped him in so many ways that he’d never go back. I have modified a few of the benefits to fit better with the momma’s lifestyle:

1. Greet the day. Be able to get up, and greet a wonderful new day. Create a morning ritual that includes saying thanks for your blessings. Be inspired by the Dalai Lama, who said, ” Everyday, think as you wake up, ‘today I am fortunate to have woken up, I am alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others, to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings, I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others, I am going to benefit others as much as I can.’ “
2. Which is a better way to start?
   • Jump out of bed, late as usual, and rush to get ready, and rush to walk, feed and water the incredible whippet, and come in to work late. Walk into work, looking rumpled and barely awake, grumpy and behind everyone else. Not a great start.
   • A renewing morning ritual, getting a lot of things done at home and at work before 8 am, and having a head start by the time everyone else gets in to work. There is no better way to start off your day than to wake early.
3. Quietude. The early morning hours are so peaceful, so quiet. Enjoy that time of peace. Think. Read. Breathe.
4. Sunrise. People who wake late miss one of the greatest feats of nature, repeated in full stereovision each and every day — the rise of the sun. Watch how the day slowly gets brighter, when the midnight blue turns to lighter blue, when the brilliant colors start to seep into the sky, when nature is painted in incredible colors. Walk the incredible whippet during this time, and look up at the sky and say to the world, “What a glorious day!” Really. The guy who originally wrote this really does that (so he says). Corny, I know.
5. Breakfast. Rise early and you actually have time for breakfast. I’m told it’s one of the most important meals of the day. Without breakfast, your body is running on fumes until you are so hungry at lunchtime that you eat whatever unhealthy thing you can find. The fattier and sugarier, the betterier. But eat breakfast, and you are sated until later. Plus, eating breakfast while reading a book and drinking tea in the quiet of the morning is eminently more enjoyable than scarfing something down on the way to work, or at the desk.
6. Exercise. There are other times to exercise besides the early morning, of course, but although exercising right after work is also very enjoyable, it’s also liable to be canceled because of other things that come up. Morning exercise is virtually never canceled.
7. Productivity. Mornings can be the most productive time of day. Do some writing in the morning, when there are no distractions, before checking email or website stats. Get so much more done by starting to work in the morning. Then, when evening rolls around, there is no work that needs to be done, and it can be time spent with the incredible whippet!
8. Goal time. Got goals? There’s no better time to review them and plan for them and do the goal tasks than first thing. Have one goal to accomplish each week. And every morning, decide what one thing that can be done today to move further towards that goal. And then, if possible, do that first thing the next morning.
9. Commute. No one likes rush-hour traffic, except for Big Oil. Commute early, and the traffic is much lighter, and get to work faster, and thus save more time.
10. Appointments. It’s much easier to make those early appointments on time if you get up early. Showing up late for those appointments is a bad signal to the person you’re meeting. Showing up early will impress them. Plus,there is time to prepare.

OK, now here are the instructions:

How to Become an Early Riser

• Don’t make drastic changes. Start slowly, by waking just 15-30 minutes earlier than usual. Get used to this for a few days. Then cut back another 15 minutes. Do this gradually until you get to your goal time.
• Allow yourself to sleep earlier. You might be used to staying up late, perhaps watching TV or surfing the Internet. But if you continue this habit, while trying to get up earlier, sooner or later one is going to give. And if it is the early rising that gives, then you will crash and sleep late and have to start over. I suggest going to bed earlier, even if you don’t think you’ll sleep, and read while in bed. If you’re really tired, you just might fall asleep much sooner than you think.
• Put your alarm clock far from your bed. (This one will unlikely work for the momma) If it’s right next to your bed, you’ll shut it off or hit snooze. Never hit snooze. If it’s far from your bed, you have to get up out of bed to shut it off. By then, you’re up. Now you just have to stay up.
• Go out of the bedroom as soon as you shut off the alarm. Don’t allow yourself to rationalize going back to bed. Just force yourself to go out of the room. My habit is to stumble into the bathroom and go pee. By the time I’ve done that, and flushed the toilet and washed my hands and looked at my ugly mug in the mirror, I’m awake enough to face the day.
• ***Do not rationalize. If you allow your brain to talk you out of getting up early, you’ll never do it. Don’t make getting back in bed an option.
• Have a good reason. Set something to do early in the morning that’s important. This reason will motivate you to get up. I like to write in the morning, so that’s my reason. Also, when I’m done with that, I like to read all of your comments!
• Make waking up early a reward. Yes, it might seem at first that you’re forcing yourself to do something hard, but if you make it pleasurable, soon you will look forward to waking up early. A good reward is to make a hot cup of tea and read a book (but I’m sure that will make the momma fall back asleep). Other rewards might be a tasty treat for breakfast (smoothies! yum!) or watching the sunrise, or meditating. Find something that’s pleasurable for you, and allow yourself to do it as part of your morning routine.
• Take advantage of all that extra time. Don’t wake up an hour or two early just to read your blogs or surf the internet. Don’t wake up early and waste that extra time. Get a jump start on your day! I like to use that time to get a head start on planning for the rest of the day, on exercising or meditating, and on reading. By the time 6:30 rolls around, I’ve done more than many people do the entire day.

Do you think she can do it? Only time will tell!

Now let’s have some fun!

Duchenne stimulating muscles of facial expression with electricity.

Plate from Mécanisme de la Physionomie Humaine (1862) demonstrates various expressions from Duchenne’s electrical stimulation studies.

It’s a Litter Box Cake!

Here is the recipe [From Dolittler: How to Make a Litterbox Cake]:

Ingredients

• 2 recipes of brownies
• 1 recipe chocolate frosting (not canned)
• 2 recipes of angel food or white cake
• 1 large box of Nerds…pick out the blue and green ones
• 1 bag Tootsie Rolls
• 1 brand-new litter box (hand-washed)
• 1 brand-new litter scooper (hand-washed)
• 1/4 cup dark honey

Assembly

1. Line the bottom of the litter box with brownie squares
2. Soften the frosting in the microwave to achieve a pour-able consistency
3. Pour frosting over the brownies in an even layer and smooth out into the corners
4. In a large bowl, crumble the cake into fine, litter-like crumbs and sprinkle to cover the brownie/frosting layer
5. Sprinkle blue and green Nerds evenly over the top (to resemble air freshening crystals)
6. Sculpt Tootsie rolls into realistic kitty turds
7. Randomly insert litter scooper
8. Scatter and embed Tootsie roll sculptures into cakey litter
9. Pour honey in one spot on the cakey litter to simulate a pool of urine
10. Apply litter box splashguard for complete effect!
11. Dig in!